The world breaks everyone, and afterward, some are strong in the broken places.
Ernest Hemingway
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THE WAITING GAME

9/23/2019

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HOPE IS IMPORTANT BECAUSE IT CAN MAKE THE PRESENT MOMENT LESS DIFFICULT TO BEAR. IF WE BELIEVE THAT TOMORROW WILL BE BETTER, WE CAN BEAR A HARDSHIP TODAY.
                                                                              Thich Nhat Hanh

I have a feeling that everyone of us has encountered a Drama Queen at some point in our lives. You know, the chick that thinks something is so important in her life, that she has to dwell on it and talk and talk and talk about it, with a whole lot of "I"s involved. Well, buckle up, Buttercup, here's your new friend, Drama Queen Janene (hey it rhymes).

Okay dokey . . .  so I went and had my PET scan done today. It took about 3 hours total, but was no real big deal. The techs were super nice, and they got a kick out of my huge titanium rod in my leg showing up on the scan. (I told them it comes in handy when going to the casino and sitting close to a slot machine --- NOT!).  All in all, things went fine.

Then I got to thinking about tomorrow. My appointment with the oncologist is at 11:00 and I am trying very hard to stay calm and cool. Every so often, I have a mini anxiety attack, but I tamp it back down when I feel it starting. I began to realize that when I get the results tomorrow, it may make a huge impact on my life. IF the scan shows any sparkles, well . . .  I guess I will handle it okay. But, IF it does show something positive, that pretty much spells out that things might be speeding up for me and my life. (Real Drama Queen stuff here.  Sorry).  Most people do not have to go through the ordeal of finding out what may or may not be the ending of their time on this great earth. 

​Lots of stuff goes through your mind. All the things you still want to do or get done. You worry about those who you will leave behind. Yes, they will survive. Yes, they will go on with their own lives and  be  fine. But, just for that period of time, everyone hurts. I've been through that with my parents, my in-laws,  other family members, and several friends.

Soooooo . . .  that's Scenario Number One.

Scenario Number Two is that there will not be a single, stinking sparkley sparkle anywhere on the scan. That's my hope. That's my goal. That's my prayer. So, I guess I will find out tomorrow, and when I hear what is going on, I'll let you all know. Okay? 

  Just one big, fat waiting game. That's all for now.    

​  Drama Queen Janene signing off.

                                                 GOD BLESS YOU ALL AND GOD BLESS OUR COUNTRY





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    Janene...

    ... was diagnosed with breast cancer on November 11, 2013. This is a place for all of the people who love and care about her to get the information about her treatment and her personal experience of kicking cancer's ass, (sometimes from her daughter's perspective). It's hard to stand by and not be able to do anything to help. Writing gives my mom an outlet and allows both of us to share information during this time. Therefore, we blog :) 

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