Walt Whitman
I was just sitting here thinking that MY reality today is that I am becoming angry. Weird, huh? I have noticed that in the last few weeks that I am becoming kinda snotty and snippy. I am attributing that to this to the two post-mastectomy treatments of the "preventative" chemo. What I can't figure out is that this is supposed to be the clean-up, end-of-the hard-job process. I know there are steroids involved which probably can change your personality. Well, I had to stop at the bank yesterday. While there, I told the teller that waited on me to please tell Chrystal F.(Chrystal was at another branch) that I was sorry that I had been snippy to her on a previous visit. I find myself getting very impatient with sales clerks, fellow drivers on the road (no Road-Rage yet, though), and even poor Lon. I had to apologize for snapping at him for absolutely nothing the other day. I also find myself becoming more clumsy, especially when the Virtigo has me walking to the right - right - right. Spinning rooms are not my favorite thing! I also find myself getting so very tired but I am sleeping a lot more, which my friends are encouraging. Not only taking naps, but going to bed earlier.
I am fully aware that all of this will pass, but it bums me out that I am so critical of other people. When you would just like to snap someone in two like a dry twig, you know the drugs are affecting your personality. Fortunately, my anger is 99% directed at strangers. It's the poor guy I live with that gets what's left over.
Things have calmed down a bit with Dad. I had to go sign some more papers for him at The Club yesterday, and then had a visit with him before going to retrieve Mr. Alec after school. Dad seems quieter but still insists that he is supposed to be in a different building where there are apartments. We had shown him Summit Point in Marion prior to picking the place he is at, and I think he remembers that. It was large, spacious with his own kitchen and living room, plus bedroom and bath. But he didn't want to go there because he thought it was too fancy. NOW he thinks that is where he should be. Oy vey. He is not wearing the cotton slacks we got him. He is wearing his old bibbies. I need to stop at Theisen's today and pick him up some new ones. If that is what he wants, that's what he will get.
I am making a promise to myself to try to restrain myself from being such a snotty, crabby person from now on. Think it will work? Hope so!!!!!!!!!!!! ;)
GOD BLESS YOU ALL